From navigating bad influences at school to handling behavioral issues at home, parenting has never been easy. But now, parents have an entirely new space to traverse with their kids: Their phones. While new technologies can take some of the entertainment-burden off of parents, allow kids to explore their hobbies and academic interests, and even give kids another way to connect with family and their peers, the downsides of technology are obvious to many families.
But smartphones and the internet don’t seem to be going away any time soon; if anything, they’re just becoming a bigger part of our lives. Fortunately, there are some strategies for managing the role of screens in your household and making sure your kids stay safe online.
How Much Are Kids Actually Online?
To no one’s surprise, kids spend a lot of time online. One 2022 study found that teens (aged 13-18) spent an average of 8 hours and 39 minutes per day on entertainment screen media (excluding schoolwork). Tweens (ages 8-12) average 5 hours and 33 minutes daily.
If teens are in school for about 7 hours a day and ideally sleep 9 hours, that means they spend their entire time outside of school looking at their phones.
While the numbers for younger children aren’t quite so dire – kids aged 5-8 spent an average of 3 hours and 28 minutes daily on screens – they’re still using technology for far more of their days than the recommended 1 to 2 hours.
The Effects of Technology on Kids’ Mental Health
Not all societal changes are bad. And while there are a lot of positives that come with widely-available internet and digital technologies, the impacts of extremely high tech usage – especially by kids – can be detrimental to mental health.
One study of US teens found that higher screen times (over 4 hours) was correlated with higher rates of anxiety and depression. Another found that of 11,727 children ages 9-10, screen time was moderately associated with worse mental health, increased behavioral problems, and decreased academic performance.
Kids with high screen times often see their mental health decrease alongside their academic performance. While there are many potential reasons for this – less time spent studying or with in-person friends, decreased attention spans – these effects may be dispersed unevenly depending on the specific technology used.
Video Games
Playing video games is considered an active use of technology. The player is not just observing other people’s content; they’re creating something of their own. While some studies suggest that high video game usage can decrease social competence, video games are less heavily associated with depression than other forms of tech.
Social Media
Social media is similarly addictive to video games, but social media users often (but not always) engage with it passively. They scroll through content, often aspirational content that leads them to compare their own lives to the snapshots they see on screen. Heightened social media usage is associated with depressive symptoms, behavioral issues, and decreased grades.
Steps to Protect Your Children
Even if it feels like your kids’ screen times have gotten out of control, you can still intervene. Try out the following techniques:
- Put on parental controls. Especially for younger children, there is no shame in blocking and monitoring how your kids spend their time online. You can prevent them from exploring unsafe sites and keep track of where all that time goes. As your kids get older though, it’s worth bringing them into the conversation about how much digital privacy they can expect.
- Limit screen time. Put screen-time limits on their devices. You can even get physical app blockers to prevent your kids from overriding their permissions.
- Encourage in-person activities. If you’re going to take screens away, make sure to provide an activity to take their place. If you’re decreasing your kids’ screen allowances, consider allowing them more opportunities to play in real life without constant structure and signing them up for afterschool activities.
- Be sympathetic to their interests. You probably like to go on your phone; so do your kids. They aren’t spending so much time online because there’s something wrong with them. They’re doing it because screens are addictive and often fun. This may even mean spending time with your kid by playing their favorite video game or sending each other memes. Remember that you’re on the same team when you address how to manage technology going forward.
- Prioritize your connection with your kids, outside of technology. If there’s a disconnect between you and your kids, it might go deeper than screens. Put effort into spending quality time with them and establishing a relationship in which you can speak freely and lovingly about your concerns. And when you’re with your kids, model the behavior you want to see; i.e., put your own phone away.
When You Need Further Support
While most families struggle to figure out sustainable relationships with technology, some problems require assistance to move past. If your child’s behavior is spiraling out of control or you need help knowing the right course of action, it might be time to consider professional support.
Contact us if you decide you need that additional support. Advantage Mental Health Center is a boutique psychiatry practice dedicated to providing personalized evidence-based mental health care. Our team is in your corner, and we can find practical solutions for your family together.
Sources:
Rideout, Victoria, Alanna Peebles, Supreet Mann, and Michael B. Robb. Common Sense Census: Media Use by Tweens and Teens, 2021. San Francisco, CA: Common Sense, 2022.
Mann, Supreet, Angela Calvin, Amanda Lenhart, and Michael B. Robb. The Common Sense Census: Media Use by Kids Zero to Eight, 2025. San Francisco, CA: Common Sense Media, 2025.
Zablotsky, Benjamin, Joseph Gindi, and Amanda E. Ng. “Associations Between Screen Time Use and Health Outcomes Among US Teenagers.” Preventing Chronic Disease 22 (2025): e05. http://dx.doi.org/10.5888/pcd22.240537.
Nagata, Jason M., Catherine A. Cortez, Kyle T. Ganson, Puja Iyer, Jason M. Nagata, Jason M. Nagata, Fiona C. Baker, and Andrea K. Garber. “Screen Time and Mental Health: A Prospective Analysis of the Adolescent Brain Cognitive Development (ABCD) Study.” BMC Public Health 24, no. 1 (October 2024): 2737. https://doi.org/10.1186/s12889-024-20102-x.
Domingues-Montanari, Sophie. “The Impact of Heavy and Disordered Use of Games and Social Media on Adolescents’ Psychological, Social, and School Functioning.” Computers in Human Behavior 91 (February 2019): 144-152. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.chb.2018.09.028.
Boer, Manon, Loes Keijsers, and Sebastiaan Engels. “The Impact of Social Media & Technology on Child and Adolescent Mental Health.” Cureus 16, no. 12 (December 2024): e76143. https://doi.org/10.7759/cureus.76143.